Thursday, December 30, 2010

Snowed In

I really want to be in my apartment right now but I can't because of the snowstorm.  I'm stuck at my parents house for the time being but my dad is going to drive me back tomorrow. 

There's a book in my apartment that I have yet to finish but was sort of the inspiration for this blog.  It's called Refuse to Choose by Barbara Sher (also the author of a great book called Wishcraft).  The book really made me realize that I don't need one passion or focus for the rest of my life.  Everyone always tells you to find what you are passionate about and make that into your career.  It seems simple enough but what if you don't know your passion..you feel like nothing you do is ever good enough. I love to take pictures but I don't want to be a photographer.  I love cooking but I don't want to be a chef. I love scrapbooking but I'm not going to design paper and the scrapbooking blog was a failure.  Just because I'm passionate about something doesn't mean I want it to be my career. I think my job is good enough. I don't dread going into work (anymore), I make money and I have health insurance. It gives me a chance to do the things I really love...and I love to do lots of things.

Right now I can't do anything except pack up my stuff for tomorrow.  I love being with my parents but I can't wait to be back on my own.  Until then have a happy and healthy new year!

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Welcome!

Hello and welcome to my blog!

This is my third attempt at writing a blog..they always say third time's a charm right?  Hopefully.  Why so many attempts?  Well, everyone always says to write what you know and write about what you are passionate about. People want to know you are an expert on a subject or want to find someone who shares their interests and will maybe inspire them. 

My first attempt, I decided to write a blog about putting myself out there..being less shy, trying more daring things.  I imagined a world where I was jumping into the unknown, tapping into my unknown passions in life.  Inspiring readers across the nation, gaining a book deal and finding my true love. It was to be epic! I was going to do a book tour, make appearances on The View, quit my job and tell everyone about how to live their life just like me.  Well...that lasted a month.  The truth that i discovered about myself was that I hate putting myself out there.  I don't want to jump out of airplanes, sing karaoke or travel to India to meet my spirit guide. Even thinking about it makes me want to crawl back into bed and take a nap.  I applaud all you go-getter bloggers out there.  It's just not my thing.

Depressed that my first attempt turned out to be a suckfest, I got to work on my second blog.  This time I was going to write about a hobby I enjoy...scrapbooking.  I even paid to use a blog platform so I could have a fancy domain name (my piece of advice for the day...don't do this, blogger is way too easy and free).  I wrote a few entries but then I started stressing out.  I didn't want to scrapbook everyday.  I have a full time job. I like to watch TV at night and read magazines.  I can't even take that many pictures!  My life is not that exciting as evidenced by my first blog.  So there went that...money down the drain.

My first two attempts were complete failures. I felt like a failure.  They say to write what you know but what do I know?  I am not passionate about anything.  Sometimes I don't even start projects because I'm so scared they will fail or I'll lose interest too fast.  Then I'll get the same questions..oh whatever happened to your blog? Are you still scrapbooking?  Are you still writing?  What do you want to do with your life?

Who says I need to be passionate about one thing in my life? One thing for the rest of my life?  That's crazy!  Yes I like scrapbooking but I don't want to be known as a scrapbooker. Sometimes I want to make quilts or paint or sculpt.  Some weeks I'm obsessed with cooking to the point where I even want to make my own ketchup.  Other weeks I want to sculpt or make jewelry.  Who says we need to only be interested in one thing?  Leonardo Da Vinci might've painted the Mona Lisa but he was also a musician, a scientist, an inventor, an engineer and a mathematician.  Madonna is a singer, an actress and writes children's books. Did you know Ken Jeong (of "Hangover" and "Community") is an actual medical doctor and a comedian.

So long story short, this blog is focused on my many passions in life and my attempts to not be afraid to start something challenging and new.  I'm going to stop being afraid of people judging me. Who cares if I start something and don't finish it? If one day I'm talking about scrapbooking and the next day I'm making a lasagna.  I just want to write and be free.  I guess maybe I'm putting myself out there after all.